Monday, August 2, 2010
If you were given the powers to recreate yourself, what change(s) would you make?
I have asked a lot of people this question and many have come up with answers such as: "I would have chosen a different career," "I would make sure I had different parents," "I would have disobeyed my parents who suggested I become a lawyer and do what I had always wanted," "I would not have married that monster in my house," "I would have chosen to be an American," The answers are endless.And if some of us had the power to recreate, many would change the shape of their noses, the colour of their eyes, some would choose to be taller, bigger... Name it!
Now, with the presence of plastic surgery techniques and other cosmetic procedures, many have gone ahead to make some of their body features more or less prominent in order to chose their taste. But the question is; does it change who you are inside?
Difficult, this argument may seem but the truth is that it is mainly our mindsets that determine how we react to how others perceive us and situations around us. Many people have gone ahead to artificialy enhance their natural looks to gain acceptance but many researches have shown that the old 'devils' still run in their minds.
A colleague recounted how misserable she felt whenever she carried a tag on her mind about how skinny she was and how peolple would always consider her hungry looking and 'lekpa'(a slang that describes very slim people in Nigeria). She felt everyone saw her that way. She created a wall around her self and was overtly self-conscious. She became so suspicious of what everyone was thinking when they came her way. But many at times she was wrong.
She found this out when she saw another fellow she knew she looked better than, carrying herself with confidence. The fellow was affable, smiled often, was successful in what she was doing and mixed up well with others.Then she knew that many people did not see the fellow the way she had thought.
Lezie, outrightly knew that she was not getting younger and life needed to be enjoyed. She looked her self in the mirror and took a life changing decision. What did she see? A pretty, successful, loving ambitious lady who would make a great wife. She made a commitment to look simple but her best. And when she walked she smiled. She made friends. She learned how to be assertive. Even when people tried to ridicule her or joke about her skinny looks, she took it in good light; for she knew deep inside her was a treasure. A gift that would affect the life of others. A star, shining bright.
Today, years after, Lezie is doing well in her career. She is married to a man she loves, who got enthralled by her easy going and positive outlook. When you encounter this lady; her enthusiasm is infectious. You would not even remember if she is skinny or not (Yes, she is looking as fresh as ever-perharps, marrying a loving husband does a lot of magic to women!)
What about you? Do you still lock yourself up in your closet still wishing that your circumstances or looks were different? Do you still live in the past denying the joy and benefits of the present? Do not let your game depreciate. Make a commitment to be proud of who you are because there is a star in you. You have learned from your failures. Your futur will be brighter. Your present is here to be enjoyed. You are good looking and even if anyone wants to make you look bad, shake it off! Stay on the high road- Be proud to be who you are! The achiever, the lovable one, ... that is who you are and things will get even better.