You’ll Never Grow Unless

Thanks to Bella Naija. Game Toppers brings to you a new piece by Nigerian model, actor and TV personality that Uti Nwachukwu, wrote exclusively for Bella Naija .

The 32-year-old who recently celebrated his birthday in South Africa, previously penned an article  about not carrying vultures into your new life.

In “You’ll Never Grow Unless…”, he talks about moving to a place of success and more.

Read;
Yeah, the headline caught your attention didn’t it?

Sounds like the curse of an angry relative, spouse, friend, abi?

The truth is…you will never grow unless you show that you are ready for the blessings by rising above your current situation.

Sitting at a popular lounge in Lagos, I watch a group of girls all well dressed chatting, laughing, toasting to life and saying “we run this town” even breaking into the Rihanna chorus. Now that’s a LOL moment.

Not far off is also a group of young men in designer apparel throwing it up with 10 buckets of champagne and shouting “where ya rozay..show me ya rozay (rosé)”.
1.) Fiction: Wow! These peeps are living the life and their dreams
2.) Fact: Na only one person dey pay all the bills while others are follow follow, pose pose
3.) Worst Case Scenario: They finish partying, have no money to pay and leave their phones or car keys behind till they settle their bills.

Permit me to laugh out loud at this point : bwaaaaahahahahahahahahahahahahahhaah.

Okay that’s done….

It amazes me how people with crowd mentality are constantly waiting for that super natural blessing to come and take them out of their current situation. Comparing themselves with the leader of the group while they wait to covet.

Really, you are praying and fasting? And then you go back to your clique to pretend to pop rosé and run this town? Wake Up!

Especially the young generation today, are you kidding me?

Okay, let’s say you get a blessing, how are you going to handle it? How will you cater for it?

The same you that will say “Ah I won’t go through this or that or suffer ‘cos God will not give me something I cant handle”. Exactly!

If you show God that you are an irresponsible little pretentious spoiled brat, how do you expect him to load you with blessings fit for a king?

Just imagine leaving your only child in the care of a baby sitter that allowed 6 puppies to die under her care. Your answer is as good as mine.

Then there is the clique mentality. Show me one HUGELY SUCCESSFUL man that became successful while being part of a clique?

Show me one that became successful, then joined or started a clique and remained or became more successful? (Even music bands split and only 1 becomes the star).

Names anyone? Talk Nah? Oh your still thinking abi? Ponder some more while I go on.

To succeed, you have to rise above the clique. In my other article, I said to rise you have to die a little on the inside, you have to be broken…alone! Yes no man is an island I know I know, I’m not saying be a recluse o. Not at all.

But I’m saying you cannot move and live in a clique constantly. Have times you set out for friends.Don’t make it a lifestyle.

Do you know only one person can cause you chronic delay? (Remember Abraham and Lot?…. Your eyes are opening now ba?)

If you are in a clique now. Think of how much progress (legit) you have gotten with your so called ”hommies and babes”. Yeah your starting to realize?

Success, failure and stagnancy are highly infectious! How many people will sit and watch you make it out of the clique and leave them behind? You are dreaming, if you think it’s a reality.

I Uti Nwachukwu have been on both sides. And for every time a new chapter was to begin, I often found myself in a place where not a lot of people are around me, a time where the things that excite the juvenile become boring, a time where spending time with God became deeper, and then BOOM! New blessings! New Doors, My new Chapter.

You cannot be irresponsible and expect God to give you the responsibility that comes with being blessed. If you do not know how to manage yourself at NOTHING, then SOMETHING will never come to past in your life.

You will see that you will continue to live the false life of complacency and the false hope of the lazy man.

It’s time to rise up! Rise above the life of cliques! Start doing something no matter how small, sober up.

Take the bull by the horns. Stop being a liability to people and move on to the new friends till they too get tired of you.

Start being a provider and cater for your own self and your family and be a helper to someone.

I’m no pastor or shrink, I’m just a man who learns from everyday experiences and shares with the lives of people whom God has decided to use me to touch.

A word is enough for the wise. Start now before it gets too late. Try it and see how once again you shall rise like the Phoenix from the ashes of your past mistakes with the lessons as the wind with which you shall glide upon with the help of God.

And remember…
It always begins with a choice.

Picture: courtesy, aprokocity.com

Our Thoughts are Powerful

Determine from the moment you stop reading this to fill your mind only with positive and happy thoughts. Do it in such a way that whenever a negative limiting thought creeps into your mind, you fight it and replace it with positive and reassuring thoughts. Get back to this blog after about three hours and drop your feedback.

Our thoughts affects us in many ways. They affect our emotional state and also determine what we do or say to people. A life of constant gratitude generates positive thoughts. If we constantly worry about our past or a future event that has not even occurred then we have negative thoughts.

Positive thoughts refreshes the body and create healing. It produces joy in our lives. Positive thoughts reduce stress in our lives.

Thoughts affect our heart rate. When you are afraid or embarrassed, it shows on your face. Likewise when you are joyful, your face glows. It shows that our mind and body are interconnected.

Because our thoughts are powerful and determine what happens to us, we must control them. Why get disturbed over a future event that has not even occurred? What if it never happens?

Choosing our thoughts will help us dwell on the kind of thoughts that count.  Always evaluate your thoughts and consider what your next thought would be.

When you learn to consciously control your thoughts by replacing negative mindset with positive thoughts, you would find out that you have extra energy to work out every day.

Negativity is captivity. Run away from it. Watch your thoughts, they determine your actions, which determine your behaviour.

Your thoughts rule your world.

Picture: courtesy, www.thisdrenchedsky.org

SUPER EAGLES: THIS IS THE TIME TO SHINE AGAIN!

Twenty years ago, Nigerians sat glued to their television sets, apprehensive and expectant, wondering what would be the outcome of the nation's first game in FIFA(Federation of International Football Association) world cup, USA 94. The Super Eagles surpassed expectations by pundits as they thrashed highly rated Bulgaria which had the likes of Hristo Stoichkov by three unreplied  goals.

Today, Nigerians are expectant again. There is also a level of apprehension because the Super Eagles team have not been spectacular in their pre-world cup friendly games. The 1994 team which paraded the likes of Rashidi Yekini, Emmanuel Amuneke, Daniel Amuneke, Jay Jay Okocha, Uche Okechukwu and Finidi George were rated the fifth best team in the world this is as compared to the present Eagles who are rated 44th in the world according to FIFA rankings.

However, there are some similar scenarios between the 1994 Super Eagles and the present crop of Super Eagles. Both teams went to the world cup as African Champions having won the preceding African Cup of Nations. Also, the coaches in-charge stayed over two years taking charge of the team before the world cup. Clemens Westerhorf took over as Super Eagles Coach in 1990, four years to USA 94 FIFA world cup while Stephen Keshi has been in charge of the Super Eagles since 2012.

Nigerian Football authorities have a reputation for easily firing and hiring coaches. Bora Mulitinovic , Adegboye Onigbinde and Lars Largerback were hired to coach the Super Eagles to the France 98, Japan/Korea 2002 and South Africa 2010 FIFA world cups respectively a few months if not weeks before the world cup.

The die is cast as Nigeria faces Iran tonight. Will the Super Eagles win this game? The last game the Super Eagles won in the FIFA world cup was against Bulgaria in the 1998 world cup. With Argentina in Nigeria's group in a fourth world cup, this is the time to win Argentina, not because Super Eagles have the best talent but because of pride and the 'Naija spirit'

Brazil 2014:

 

 
This is the time to shine again. Go Super Eagles! Go! Fly in Brazil.

Do not Let People Define You by Your Failures

I sat perplexed as I heard his story. His songs re-echoed in my head. I could imagine him playing the guitar. Every touch on the string brought out melodious music, so inspiring; touching me deep down in my soul. Yes, I could say that even my bone marrows were shaken. He sang those songs that have become favourites in church choirs in Nigeria.

"I ran away from school. It was so unbearable. I had got an extra year in the university and so I returned to school to face it. It was necessary that my extra semester courses had to be up to fifteen credit units... "

He kept quiet again. He was still staring into space. Then he took a deep breath, turned his head and stared right into my eyes. 

"But I failed again, seven credit units in all."

What he said, hit me. My heart was racing. I had thought my own story was the worse.

"That was when I ran away."

I thought about his running away. I could imagine his strides as he raced to nowhere in particular. But that was not what he meant. This was a young man born with a silver spoon who was privileged to be an undergraduate of one of the best private universities in the country.

"I was frustrated. I saw myself as a failure. If it were even a third class degree or pass, at least I would have something to show for my years in the higher institution."

I readjusted on my seat. I brought my arms closer to my chest. My heart was racing fast. As I folded my arms, I was able to calm my anxiety.

"Home was hell. Nobody saw anything good in me. I got no single encouragement. My father saw me as cursed . "

He paused. Then he looked at me again.

"I will never forget the day my father took me to a white garment church for prayers. Oh! that day..."  he shook his head, "they beat the hell out of me."

I thought about who he was today. He had performed in major concerts. He had links with the best music producers and entertainment bigwigs in the country. I could remember seeing his pictures with Cobhams Asuquo and Wale Adenuga. These are great minds he had worked with.

"Those songs you so much love were written when I was at the deepest pit in life. There were what I used to encourage myself when I felt the world had rejected me."

I was not alone, I could remember how I often felt like an outcast back home because my parents were looking down on me. I had an extra year to contend with in a public university at a time when my younger ones who had attended private universities had both graduated. Now, I had seen someone who had a worse story to tell. 

"In all of these things, God has been so kind to me." He said, as he patted his hands on my back.

Yes, he was right. I beamed with smiles, I was lifted.

 We were two of a kind. Though we were both undergraduates of Mathematics in our various schools, it was my love for music that got me to know him. While I was going to face my extra year courses, as soon as the lecturers in Nigerian universities call off their strike action, he had given up on his own. Then I thought about my church choir. I was going to lead the worship session on Sunday. I knew his story was going to reverberate all over me when I sing. The world needs to hear his story.

This is not a time to give up on your dreams. Even if the people closest to you have written you off. It is time to tell yourself that you have what it takes to excel. There are people out there that you are better than. Follow your passions and do not let people define you by your failures. That you failed does not mean you are a failure. Brace yourself up and believe. The forces of nature will work in your favour when you persistently determine and work to succeed. 

And do not forget, just as my good friend said in his story, 'in all of these things, God will be kind to you.'

Thanks to my friend Mercy, for telling me his story.

Picture, courtesy: strawberriesinheels.blogspot.com