Tuesday, November 30, 2010
My friends noticed the big difference in me when I started walking with a spring in my footsteps.
I talked with a new air of confidence. I stopped whining and was quick to point out the possibilities and opportunities that sorrounded us in an environment that was largely restricted and anti social.
And when they told me "You dey enjoy o!" I would laugh and concur with them. I had no other option but to start enjoying my environ. I wanted to stay healthy, succeed in life and quit the blame game. That I found myself in an environment very different from my expectations did not mean I should wallow in the captivity of negativity.
My orientation changed. I found another friend that added a new value to me. There was a big difference between my old friends and my new friend. I realised that I was a local champion and it is pathetic to be the most celebrated, in the midst of people with mediocre mindsets.
So many question crossed my mind. Have I grown in any way since I got to know these friends? Have I contributed positively to their lives? How come they all find it hard to make sacrifices? Can I be the star I want to be and get on top of my game if I continue mingling with these folks? What do we spend our time mostly on? It went on and on and suddenly some answers started coming.
I have grown in complaining and finding faults. I find it hard to do something really nice to them because it would make me look different and they would scorn me; except for the occassional drinks we buy each other. We have developed an attitude of 'God for all, every man for himself,' ever since we started going out. Yes! we help each other at times but many times we just say to each other 0-Y-O, which meant, 'You are on your own.'
We spent most of our time discussing other people. If any of us were absent, he would surely become the topic of our discussion. So, after having experienced this new friendship, I needed no one to tell that I was heading to nowhere significant in life with my old friends unless I could change them for good.
Old wine, they say tastes better but when it is (an old) friendship that adds no value to you, the long term effects could be most bitter! You can be the one to ignite the flame of value in your friendships. Resolve today, to add value to your friends.Think of something nice to do to them and that is the way it would come back to you. If you want to have a friend, be a friend!
Research shows that the people you associate with, would influence you in many ways over time. Before you know it, you may start thinking, talking and acting like them. When a relationship is totally sapping,limiting and only brings your mind to woes, then it is not the best for you. After you have made efforts and nothing positive is happening, move on and consider it a learning experience.
You are smart and intelligent and deserve the best. Show me your friend and I will show you who you are. Get on top of your game and do not let your acquintances, associations and friendships dimnish your vision-they should rather be your assets.
Picture, courtesy: Angela Uko
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
The internet has largely become part of us becuase of its many benefits. Today, it is the most effective means of communication, seeking information, transacting business as well as entertainment-at the least cost.
The internet has made things a lot easier as one could journey around the world by the mere click(s) of the mouse! People have met their spouses via the internet. Some others have been able to make very important business contacts through it. Information seekers are rarely dissappointed as it takes just a matter of time to get what you want.
Aside from its draw backs such us spamming, virus threats, theft of personal information, damaging information and pornography; the internet has become one of the greatest time wasters for people. You could find someone surfing the web for long hours without any significant purpose. Thus, a lot of people are increasingly being controlled by the internet instead of the other way round.
It is therefore of no surprise that social networking sites are often disabled in the internet connection of varoius work places to enable employees concentrate on their work. On several occassions we have caught ourselves surfing through our Facebook accounts in the course of work at a time we still had a lot to be done!
If you want to get on top of your game and stay on it, then you need to be a better manager of your time on the internet.
-Before you connect to the world wide web, take time to ask your self what you want to achieve.
-Make a note listing out what you intend to accomplish on the internet.
-Estimate the time it would take to accomplish each one of them. For example, apportion 20 minutes for checking and replying your emails.
-Regroup the items on your list, starting with the most important. In replying your mails also start with the most important ones except if you need to take out time to gather facts before you act on it.
-Once you have finished with a particular item on your list, move on to the next one.
-If you are seeking for a new information, make sure you understand what you are looking for, be specific in your search and stay focused in order to save time. It is possible to spend several hours seeking for information and end up achieving little. If your search is not fruitful you can postpone it to some time later.
-Do not keep gathering information and end up not acting on them. Once you are ready to start, take action. Too much information might lead to paralysis of analysis.
-Do not be distracted by pop-ups,chats, mails and clicks that you do not need to make when you are doing something important on the internet. For those who work at home(online),learn to balance your work time and free time. House chores, the television, the refrigirator and the bed could be the greates distractions.
-Entrust a specific amount of time for the internet daily and stick to it.
Picture, Courtesy: Kesmo Creations
Friday, November 5, 2010
Below is an inspirational piece by Bob Moorehead which my friend and former schoolmate, Faten Jiffry shared with me. It reminds us that in the midst of everyday's hustles and bustles, we should take time to enjoy the beautiful things of life, which are often the simplest. I have shared the SH Prayer too. Enjoy your reading!
-Live Triumphantly Everyday Because Life is Short-
The paradox of our time in history is that we have taller buildings but shorter tempers, wider Freeways, but narrower viewpoints. We spend more, but have less, we buy more, but enjoy less. We have bigger houses and smaller families, more conveniences, but less time. We have more degrees but less sense, more knowledge, but less judgment, more experts, yet more problems, more medicine, but less wellness.
We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch TV too much, and pray too seldom. We have multiplied our possessions, but reduced our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and
hate too often.
We've learned how to make a living, but not a life. We've added years to life not life to years. We've been all the way to the moon and back, but have trouble crossing the street to meet a new neighbor. We conquered outer space but not inner space. We've done larger things, but not better things.
We've cleaned up the air, but polluted the soul. We've conquered the atom, but not our prejudice. We write more, but learn less. We plan more, but accomplish less. We've learned to rush, but not to wait. We build more computers to hold more information, to produce more copies than ever, but we
communicate less and less.
These are the times of fast foods and slow digestion, big men and small character, steep profits and shallow relationships.
These are the days of two incomes but more divorce, fancier houses, but broken homes. These are days of quick trips, disposable diapers, throwaway morality, one night stands, overweight bodies, and pills that do everything from cheer, to quiet, to kill. It is a time when there is much in the showroom window and nothing in the stockroom. A time when technology can bring this letter to you, and a time when you can choose either to share this insight, or to just hit delete...
Remember, to spend some time with your loved ones, because they are not going to be around forever. Remember, say a kind word to someone who looks up to you in awe, because that little person soon will grow up and leave your side.
Remember, to give a warm hug to the one next to you, because that is the only treasure you can give with your heart and it doesn't cost a cent.
Remember, to say, "I love you" to your partner and your loved ones, but most of all mean it. A kiss and an embrace will mend hurt when it comes from deep inside of you.
Remember to hold hands and cherish the moment for someday that person might not be there again. Give time to love, give time to speak! And give time to share the precious thoughts in your mind.
— Bob Moorehead
Live Each Day to the Fullest
Live each day to the fullest.
Get the most from each hour, each day,
and each age of your life.
Then you can look forward with confidence,
and back without regrets.
Be yourself... but be your best self.
Dare to be different and follow your own star.
Don't be afraid to be happy
...enjoy what is beautiful.
Love with all your heart and soul.
Believe that those you love, love you.
When you are faced with decision,
make that decision as wisely as possible,
then forget it.
The moment of absolute certainty never arrives.
And above all, remember that God helps those
who help themselves. Act as if everything depended on you
And pray as if everything depended on God.
~ SH Payer
PICTURE- Courtesy: Ugochukwu Egboluche