Sunday, January 10, 2010

Hold Your Cool

It is certain that there are times we find ourselves in the midst of strong disagreements, verbal attacks or other kinds of conflicts. Well, the feeling of 'I have given him a piece of my mind' does not work all the time especially if a debate gets so heated up.

Anger generated from such verbal exchanges could linger on affecting our psyche, thinking and work. Therefore constantly indulging in quarrels, fights and similar conflicts, where things just get out of hand could hold us from getting on top of our games.

Sometimes it may seem beyond our control where the other fellow just refuses to understand.

I came across these piece by David J. Schwartz, he related his experience where he talked about developing an understanding attitude;

A few months ago at the reservation desk of a Memphis hotel, I saw an excellent demonstration of the right way to handle folks like this.

It was shortly after 5PM and the hotel was busy registering new guests. The fellow ahead of me gave his name to the clerk in a commanding way. The clerk said, "Yes Sir, Mr R.., we have a fine single for you."
'"Single?" shouted the fellow. "I ordered a double."
The clerk said very politely, "Let me check, sir."

He pulled the guest's reservation from the file and said, "I am sorry, sir. Your telegram specified a single. I'd be happy to put you in a double room, sir, if we had any available. But we simply do not."

Then the irate customer said, "I don't care what the h*** that piece of paper says, I want a double."

Then he started in with that "do-you-know-who-I-am" bit, followed with ''I'll have you fired. You'll see, I'll have you fired.''

As best he could, under the verbal tornado, the young clerk injected, "Sir, we're terribly sorry, but we acted on your instructions. "

Finally the customer, really furious now, said, "I wouldn't stay in the best suite in this ********hotel now that I know how badly managed it is," and stormed out.

I stepped up to the desk, thinking the clerk who had taken one of the worse public tongue lashings I'd seen in some time, would be upset. Instead he greeted me with one of the finest "Good evening, sirs" I'd ever heard. As he went through the routine of processing my room, I said to him, "I certainly admire the way you handled yourself just a moment ago. You have tremendous temper control"

"Well, sir," he said, "I really can't get mad at a fellow like that. You see, he really isn't mad at me. I was just the scapegoat. The poor fellow may be in bad trouble with his wife, or his business may be off, or maybe he feels inferior and this was his golden chance to feel like a wheel. I'm just the guy who gave him a chance to get something out of his system."

The clerk added, "Underneath he's probably a very nice guy. Most guys are "

Remember those two short sentences next time someone declares war on you. Hold your fire. The way to win in situations like this is to let the other fellow blow his stack, and then forget it.

An interesting story. 'Not an easy thing to do,' you may say but the fact that watching people(two) make a spectacle of themselves in shouts puts them in a bad light; even the one considered to be understanding.

Hold your cool. It will help you think better and even farther. Your game deserves to get to the next level.

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